Archive for the 'Family Friends Pets Kids' Category
…cannot be removed by argument.
I belonged to a group encouraging women in a particular area of technology. (No, I am NOT going to name them, as it is very recent past, and the post is a general message now to groups of all genders, not a gripe at a particular group of people.)
Thiis group, for whatever reason, decided that it felt the need, collectively, to exclude men, as a general principle, from meetings and other events. I felt very strongly this was a dangerous path to walk down, and wrote them an email, explaining why - and then I left the group. No, I don’t think I will be missed.
I decided to post the email I sent to explain how I feel about this situation. Discrimination, no mater what positive spin we put on it, is discrimination. If, to redress appalling levels of gender imbalance in the IT industry, (and many others), we feel we need to lessen or discriminate against one group to promote another, we are just moving the problem around. The issue is to END discrimination, not rebadge it.
Basing any decision on gender, colour, nationality, religion, or sexuality is discrimination. You can say it is positive, but thats just a label hung on it to pretty up the reality. Lessening anyone is not okay.
I am all for women’s groups, to promote, support, and encourage. But when we move the cost around, so we, as women, aren’t paying anymore, we make men pay, then we are just doing the same thing we cry out against. I would rather work as people, to end discrimination, full stop.
I must state, however, that not admitting idiots, morons, and anyone who is sexist, racist, homophobic, or xenophobic, or otherwise intolerant, is always fine with me:) Why? CAUSE YOU BORE ME! Yep, I will discriminate based on anyone being a total twat. Get over it:)
So, for your edification, viewing pleasure, and an attempt to see if anyone still bothers with hate mail, the email:
I have thought a lot before responding to this. But, as a woman who has
children of both genders, I felt it important. I target noone in
particular, but am wanting the group to examine something that I find so
very disturbing. I will be leaving the group post this, as I believe I
do not belong for reasons expounded below, but wanted to state why as
clearly as possible. Please understand, it is done without rancour, or a
wish to accuse or insult. I ask only that you examine what I have said
with an open mind. You are all free to reject it, but vitriol is
unseemly for intelligent beings.
You know, I am all for a group encouraging and supporting women. I just
never get a group that is bigoted in any way. And yes, I used the word
very deliberately. I am pro woman, not anti men.
When I look at my children, I do not wish them to encounter a world
where their gender means they are discriminated against. This hope does
not apply only to my daughters, excluding my son.
I am heavily in favour of women’s groups and organisations that promote,
support, educate, and facilitate women. I can do that regardless of my
gender. If I was a man who wanted to be supportive, why would turning me
away be of value?
And don’t dally around the edges by saying that men are sometimes
acceptable at events as long as they are friends or boyfriends, and they
will be occasionally tolerated. Turn this around, people. Would this be
acceptable if a male group behaved this way towards women?
Allowing men to participate does not mean women have to be lessened. Are
we so afraid that we are weak, and would not be able to stop men taking
over? That we could not be loud and have our voices heard? People can be
asked to leave, of either gender, if their aims are not shared (yes, I
have said I am, so, fret not - what an example I set:) ).
Pro women does not have to mean anti men. To me, this is walking over a
fine line. I accept for many, probably nearly all, it isn’t. Just think
about it, please. There is a rather sweet young man who is, (along with
his sisters), being raised to respect the worth of people, not genders,
sexuality, or race. I think they all deserve equally as much respect and
value.
Thank you for listening. I have enjoyed my time. I wish you all every
success.
Blogged with Flock
…but peace amid the storm.
We stood out in the heat, in the stillness. She stood close to me, we felt the rain lightly fall, together. She savoured the rain, feared the noise that had been, the thunder, the storm that had lashed us suddenly. She backed up to lean against me, seeking the safety of her mother, still able to protect her from the world.
I wrapped my arms around her, protecting her from the noise she feared, and I felt her heart beating under my hand. The heart that started in my body. For a moment, I felt connected again to her in the way we did when she was in my flesh, when I grew her, when I breathed for her, when my living was all for her.
And the elements were with us. The moment melted into one.
I smiled. And hand in hand, we came inside.
Blogged with Flock
…everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.
It is so hard for me to accept happiness, after some wild and consuming tempests, and far too many ‘opportunites for personal growth’.
Yet, oh, but yet, I am, at the moment, with several caveats for personal superstition, I am actually happy. It is terribly odd, and it is a shock and surprise dropped in my lap (that I did all I could to avoid…), but I will take my happiness where I can, thank you:) And I am grateful for the gift of joy I am being offered.
To celebrate, via New Linux User, a happy Tux cake 
…they ask no questions, they pass no criticism.
Meme time. This week’s fun bought to us via Bruce, at The Thinker’s Podium. Grr.
An interesting animal I had
I have chickens. Oddly deranged, stupid but with flashes of what passes for genius. They each have a distinct personality. Jolly good fun. Stupid damn things:) I name them things like Sandwich, Roast, Satay, Noodles, Honey, etc.
I am an odd vegetarian;)
An interesting animal I ate
The Tofubeeste.
An interesting thing I did with or to an animal
Does a stuffed penguin count? Ok, maybe there was this one guy….he was a total animal :)))
An interesting animal at the museum
Museum Guards. I dig them. (Unless forcibly stopped).
An interesting animal in its natural habitat
Penguins. Well, ok, thats just my obsession, isn’t it. Look, lets be honest, ALL animals are quite fascinating in their habitats.
Tag Katie. Oh, and Michael. Haha.
…as you want them to, but instead want them to happen as they do happen, and your life will go well.
Some daily events in Insanity Hall.
Saw Stardust. As magic as the book. Neil Gaiman rocks extremely lots:) The gang of teen girls agreed.
Finally got yet another (my fourth!! - I keep lending it out..) copy of my favourite ever book, Illusions. Anyone wants to understand me/my life philosophy, well, its a good start, (but no guarantees though, *I* don’t, why should you?;) )
Joined Facebook, thanks to HRH eldest daughter, (in this case, known as ‘ok, alright already, i will do it’!). And already, I have to say : is THIS what the fuss is about? I mean, it is pleasant and all, but when the novelty wears off, it will be like Jaiku or Twitter or one of the myriad other social networking sites i belong to. Not really visited, i suspect. We will see:)
…a convention of spiritualists.
Finally got round to setting up my streaming media server, to play movies and video on any one of our computers over the network. The 500GB external HDD is hooked up to Tardis, the server, and happily churns out my excellent media, and the kids appalling crap ( ;) ) on demand. All via a lovely web interface, that allows us to setup individual playlists etc. And ridiculously easy to setup, to!
This paragon is GNUMP3D.
A nice Ubuntu flavoured howto had pretty pictures and everything, which often helps:)
A minor fix was required to let the movies list and play:
line 2555 in /usr/bin/gnump3d is -
next if ( not $FILE_TYPES->isMovie( $file ) );
after it, add the next two lines -
# Strip directories for movies aswell
$file =~ s/^$ROOT\/(.*\/)*//;
all works thereafter:)
…it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body.
One portion of my heart is four today. He is one of the great loves of my life, as are his sisters:)
To my beloved son, your start was perilous and dire, but oh, what a wonder you have become! Such deep joy your robust sense of adventure and wild intelligence brings. I do not stop as often as I should to just delight in the whirlwind of energy and events that you bring, but when I do, the sheer glee it brings me is unbelievable. Tired as I am often, I would not change a single thing about the miracle that is you*
Happy Birthday, my son:)
* I WOULD change the mess you seem to trail behind you, but hey, keeps life interesting;)
ps, yes, I am back, out of my healing exile, if anyone missed me:)
…the grief that does not speak
whispers the o’er fraught heart
and bids it break.
Quiet at the moment, as in midst of a change and grief for what was. I am newly single, and it is a new time for me, but I am grieving the old. While my rationality says its for the best, the heart is not always the rationalist one would like it to be.
Still, healing is the way ahead. After all, now it’s all about time.
…is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.
Ok peeps, I am moving house, so besides the odd bookmark, this blog will be sleepy bobos for the next few weeks.
In the meantime:
How evil are you? Yeah, RIGHT.
…what feelings sound like.
I got tagged, thanks to Bruce, so here is my Rage entry thang. No order particularly, and I had to not put in much of my beloved music. Whats going to annoy me is the ones I have forgotten, and will think about during the day.
Kasey Chambers - Pony
The Whitlams - No Aphrodisiac
The Church - Under The Milky Way
XTC - Dear God
Tatu - 30 Minutes
Suzanne Vega - Tom’s Diner
Johnny Cash - Hurt
Radiohead - Karma Police
Sarah McLachlan - In the Arms of the Angels
Weird Al Yankovich - Smells Like Nirvana
OMD - Joan of Arc (or Enola Gay)
Icehouse - Don’t Believe Anymore
Rolf Harris - Stairway to Heaven
Tori Amos - Cornflake Girl
Vast - Touched
Peter Gabriel & kate Bush - Don’t Give Up
Shakespear’s Sister - Stay
Tears For Fears - Head Over Heels
Thomson Twins - Hold Me Now
Psychedelic Furs - Love My Way
Neil & Tim Finn - Won’t Give In
Pink Floyd - Learning to Fly
Some Reasons:
The easiest film clip choice is the Johnny Cash one. Its so painful, its exposure of his thoughts of his life journey. Trent Raznor was right, Cash now owns that song.
In the Arms of the Angels was what I would sing softly to my youngest child, when he spent two weeks in NICU after birth. The nurses and my friends were our angels.
The Nirvana cover by Weird Al is enjoyed by our whole fmily though Amish Paradise was a close second;) But I can’t hear the original without SEEING Weird Al’s clip.
Karma Police has a great animated clip - great for those late night views;)
Neil And Tim Finn in the clip for this song, look so at home with each other, and like they are enjoying the process so much, that I chose this out of their whole (joint/solo) catalogue for that alone:)
I tag Shaun and Katie.
